I ran into a couple the other night while and we had an interesting conversation about definitions. We were talking about our first kiss and I stated that depending on how you define kiss, my first could’ve come at different times. A girl kissed me on the check during an after school program in kindergarden, which sent running around like my pants were on fire. However, another truly kissed me in 7th grade in a game of Truth or Dare.
See, depending on how we define things determines how we proceed moving forward. Isn’t parenting the same? Have we sat down and truly defined what “good” parenting is, and what it isn’t?
In truth, good parenting is a combination of accepting and rejecting societal norms and pressures. If we only accept the status quo and yield completely to what society deems appropriate, not only do we rob ourselves of our cherished individuality, but we also gain the ability to have sensibilities that sway with the wind. We can lose our resistance to bad ideas and inadvertently, we may devalue solid ideas and principles that came before us in an attempt to keep up with modern times.
To truly be the best we can be, we need to define what “good” parenting is for ourselves. With that, we can readily define what success looks like, not what society says it should be. By living by our own rules and regulations, we can decrease parental anxiety because we no longer seek to please outside forces, but rather we strive to fulfill the vision of success we cultivated for ourselves.
How do you define good parenting? How has being a good parenting changed from what your parents believed? What are some social parenting norms that you reject?